This being Liberation Day, the pond felt a wild surge of excitement and decided to track the reptile reaction.
At first it seemed like bad news ...
Never mind Uncle "Cheesehead" Leon doing a Cheshire Cat routine, the news from the Nine rags was also gloomy ...
Elsewhere in the world the reaction seemed ominous ... these were the early moments at WaPo and the NY Times...
At first, the reptiles sent out a minor player, Cameron Stewart to handle the news, and he went into a witchdoctor-induced depression, lasting all of three minutes, or so the reptiles said ...
Trump’s voodoo tariffs from the Witchdoctor-in-chief will hurt all Australians, Ten per tariffs aside, Australia’s economy, businesses, jobs and opportunity will be hit far harder by the broad global pain which Trump has inflicted on our major trading partners and on the global trading system.
Cam felt shafted ...President Donald Trump said on Wednesday that he would impose a 10% baseline tariff on all imports to the United States and higher duties on some of the country's biggest trading partners, in a move that ratchets up a trade war that he kicked off on his return to the White House.
Cam lashed out...
Australia’s economy, businesses, jobs and opportunity will ultimately be hit far harder by the broad global pain which Trump has inflicted on our major trading partners and on the global trading system. Add to that the genuine risk that the fallout could trigger a market rout and even usher in a global recession and it’s not an exaggeration to say that we have witnessed one of the darkest days in world trade in our lifetime.
Trump chose to levy far higher tariffs than many economists were expecting, including 34 per cent for China, 26 per cent for India, 24 per cent for Japan and as well as a ten per cent across the board tariff on all US imports for countries like Australia.
Trump chose not to exempt Australia despite the fact that we are not even remotely a bad trading partner with the US, given that Australia is one of the few countries with a trade surplus with America and a free-trade agreement.
It was further evidence, if any was needed, that Trump pays little or no heed to the notion of alliances, loyalty or friendship with his tariff policy – just ask Canada – or even with his approach to global security – just ask Ukraine’s Volodymyr Zelensky.
The reptiles showed the mango Mussolini in action, Donald Trump holds a signed executive order on tariffs. Picture: AP.
Cam was determined to be upset, to an almost unholy reptile degree ...
Trump may only be president for the next four years, but the protectionist wall he has built for friends and foes will lead to similar walls being built around the globe – a bleak outcome for a middle power like Australia which relies on free markets for its trading prosperity.
Trust in international affairs takes years to build and when broken like this, cannot be rebuilt overnight when broken. So Trump’s tariff wall and his approach to global affairs will damage the so-called rules based order well beyond the term of his presidency.
Trump’s tariffs are a cruel trick wrought upon the most vulnerable Americans who do not understand that they will hurt them more than anyone because they will pay higher prices for goods imported into the US. It will lead to inflation from a president who was elected on a promise to reduce prices.
Trump has concealed this ugly truth from ordinary American workers by packaging it up with the pretty bow of nationalism, saying it will lead to American jobs and factories ‘roaring back.’
Nothing is final with Trump and he has made it clear he is open to negotiations over these tariff levels – a sign that he will leverage them for other outcomes.
Yet these new tariffs on many countries are so large, that it is hard to see Trump walking away from them entirely.
That chart provided an AV distraction, as you'd expect from a reality TV star, Trump shares chart showing reciprocal tariff discounts taking effect
It was all voodoo to the shafted Cam ...
If Wall St continues to plunge in the months ahead, you can expect Trump to take moves to temper the extent of these Liberation Day tariffs.
But there is no sugar coating what Trump has done to the world trading system. He has targeted America’s friends and foes with massive punitive tariffs on the false premise that they will make America great again.
It is voodoo economics which will hurt all Australians and Trump has sadly appointed himself as the witchdoctor-in-chief.
Luckily cooler heads prevailed, and relief was at hand however as the reptiles delivered updated news just before noon ...
The Duttonator was consulted and at first he had sounded gloomy ...
“We have a very trusted, long-standing and abiding relationship with the United States,” the Opposition Leader said.
“It spans 100 years and we have fought alongside and with the Americans in every major battle over that period of time.
“We have a special relationship with the United States and it hasn’t been treated with respect by the administration or by the President and the question now is what do we do to resolve this matter and to do it quickly?
“It’s clear to me that in the language that’s come out of the administration that there is a discussion to take place and it needs to take place as a matter of urgency because, as prime minister, I want to make sure that we can help our beef producers, make sure that we can help our manufacturers, grow our industry and increase employment in this country and we can do that through a normalised relationship in a trading sense with the United States and obviously to expand other markets, which is exactly what a Coalition government does and has a priority and always has had.”
The bouffant one was quickly on hand to see dark forces at work ...
Anthony Albanese has swiftly sought to maximise the political impact of Donald Trump’s tariff announcement.
By Dennis Shanahan
Damn you mango Mussolini, but the Duttonator quickly worked out who was really at fault and who should cop all the blame ...
Peter Dutton has accused Anthony Albanese of being “weak and missing in action” and has placed blame on the Prime Minister for the “position we’re in today”.
Yes, it's absolutely nothing to do with the Cantaloupe Caligula, it's all the fault of Albo ...
“It was first made known to him when it was publicly announced.
“So that talks about the influence that the Prime Minister has in relation to this matter.
“I can say this much – I want success in the relationship but it’s not going to happen if the Prime Minister finds out about things through the press. There needs to be proper negotiation and consultation.”
Mr Dutton said he had the “strength of leadership and the experience to be able to stand up and fight for us, for our country, whether it’s in relation to our national interests in the trading space, in the national security space or elsewhere”.
“The Prime Minister has been weak and missing in action and that’s why we find ourselves in the position we’re in today,” he said.
“The Prime Minister has a pathway to an outcome here that can see a better final position for the relationship and for our country. But that has not been pursued so far.”
He said Mr Albanese must do “everything he can” to talk to President Trump in light of the tariffs announcement.
“The Prime Minister hasn’t been able to get a call or a meeting with President Trump, but that needs to change and he needs to do everything he can to leverage the ambassador and others to get the relationship normalised,” the Opposition Leader said.
“It’s obvious that the Prime Minister didn’t know anything about this announcement until it was actually released to the press, which also speaks to the state of the relationship at the moment. So I want to make sure that we can, as quickly as possible, resolve this matter.”
Amazing how a gigantic suck can move so seamlessly to sucking on a gigantic scale ...
Apparently we're supposed to forget all that went before ... to borrow that Wilcox 'toon again that had featured earlier ...
The pond didn't understand why the reptiles bothered with the mutton Dutton.
Nor could the pond appreciate some of the cheap humour doing the rounds ...
The Cantaloupe Caligula confronted the cheeky, uppity penguins about their saucy insouciance (the poley bears on Jan Mayen island are almost just as bad and deserve their 10% tariff) ...
With Australia close to the penguin folly, they had Mein Gott on hand to handle the fall-out and the pond immediately knew all would be well ...
How Australia can use US tariffs to its advantage by focussing on defence, It’s vital that Anthony Albanese and Peter Dutton do not turn this into a ‘who can hit Trump the hardest’ competition but rather look at how we can turn it to our advantage.
Mein Gott reflexively went into pandering mode, doing the giant suck ... but first there came an AV distraction, Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese said the country would continue to push for President Trump to remove the tariffs he announced earlier in the day.
Mein Gott quickly hit his stride ...
But we will be drowned out in a chorus of international opposition, particularly from Asian countries who now have much higher tariffs than Australia.
It’s vital that Anthony Albanese and Peter Dutton do not turn this into a “who can hit Trump the hardest” competition but rather look at how we can turn it to our advantage.
To help guide the nation I sought advice from a person who is respected in the trade area by both political parties: former trade minister Andrew Robb. He put together many of the free trade agreements that we now enjoy.
Andrew Robb! What a relief ...
To see April 3 as Liberation Day for Australia we need to first understand that US Secretary of State Marco Rubio has made it very clear that the issue of tariffs, which was a central part of the President’s election policy manifesto, is quite separate from defence considerations.
That means Australia is liberated because the ANZUS defence alliance with the US becomes separate from what we do on the trade front.
Yes, we're truly liberated, and at this point the reptiles laboriously replicated that tariff board seen above, and then took credit for the graphic...
You could read the full list on The Hill ...
Or you could admire the short-hand X-rated version ...
So the reptile list was a huge waste of space, and rather than replicate it, the pond quickly reverted to Mein Gott and the Robbster ...
And it’s here that I sought the advice of Andrew Robb and he has put forward a strategy for both our political leaders.
“We should shine a huge light on our fundamental opposition to returning to a closed world of elite narcissism where the large and the strong do what they will, and the small and weak suffer what they must,” he says.
“We could and should make an unequivocal statement of where we stand by initiating a bold free trade initiative to combine the TPP (Trans Pacific Partnership) and the RCEP (Regional Comprehensive Economic Partnership) Free Trade Agreements to create one truly Asia/Pacific Free Trade Zone.”
Australia, Brunei, Japan, Malaysia, New Zealand, Singapore, and Vietnam are in both agreements. Cambodia, China, Indonesia, South Korea, Laos, Myanmar, the Philippines and Thailand, are only in the RCEP while Canada, Chile Mexico Peru and the United Kingdom are only in the TPP.
India is in neither agreement but we have a trade agreement with India which puts us in a rare position of advantage in the region.
Mein Gott had no beef, Our beef industry will have boundless safety reasons as to why US beef should not be allowed into Australia. Picture: Zoe Phillips
Mein Gott kept on with his cunning planning ... he's the burger king of cleverness ...
It would obviously be more effective if India also joined but that may be later. The US should be invited even though at this point under its current trade policy it would not accept.
There will be tensions with the US because China, as a member of the RCEP, would be a leading player. But thanks to Rubio we have been invited to keep defence alliances and trade agreements separate - ie we have been liberated.
And let’s keep beef separate. The beef industry will have boundless safety reasons as to why US beef should not be allowed into Australia.
But with a few extra safeguards the real reason becomes that we are protecting our beef industry. The President is right.
On the other hand, America needs our beef in its hamburger industry partly because we help insulate it against droughts and other local forces impacting US domestic beef production.
But more importantly we are integrated into the US hamburger industry.
The US focuses on highly profitable grain fed beef production for both local and export markets. It claims that it only imports beef “from countries that have gone through a rigorous USDA audit process and have proven that their food safety systems are equivalent to ours”.
By blending the higher fat content of US beef trimmings with Australian lean beef it lowers the cost of hamburgers and maintains the favour.
Theoretically, the US could replace Australian beef with local beef but it’s much more profitable to sell US beef on the export market than use it in local hamburgers.
Of course that may change if US beef is excluded from its export markets.
We are being invited by the US President to discuss beef and we should take up the invitation. It will give us the opportunity to explain that we are taking advantage of his tariffs in our region to involve ourselves more deeply in regional trade, while taking advantage of the Rubio declaration.
Why, it's a win-winning, there's so much winning in the fertile imagination of Mein Gott ... and never mind that in his fantasy island, he seems unaware that there's a giant toddler being given free rein to rule like a king ...
Then came an epic Groan, designed to put Mein Gott in the shade...
US President Donald Trump announcing the reciprocal tariffs at the White House. Picture: AFP
This article contains features which are only available in the web version, Take me there
In short ...
Surprisingly Dame Groan hadn't listened to Mein Gott explaining the tremendous upside and was sad ...
The best approach would be to tackle the weaknesses of international trade rather than the US impose unilateral tariffs, with rates varying according to reasonably cack-handed assessments of tariff and non-tariff barriers countries impose on the US.
But Donald Trump’s win-lose view of world trade has led to where we are now. On the face of it, Australia has got off lightly, with a proposed tariff of 10 per cent, the lowest on offer.
Our beef trade is singled out for special mention because we don’t import US beef for biosecurity reasons. Whether these reasons are fully justified is not entirely clear, but the way forward would be for the US to seek some clarification (and transparency) for the ban.
What is of greater concern is the relatively high tariffs being imposed on China, our largest trading partner by a country mile. It’s not certain at this stage whether the announced tariff rate is in addition to the tariffs that already apply to Chinese exports to the US.
There was an AV distraction, President Donald Trump has announced a 10% tariff on Australian exports during his ‘Liberation Day’ speech, citing Australia’s longstanding ban on American beef imports. The move is likely to escalate trade tensions between the two countries.
The Groaner thought about fighting back, but didn't have the ticker ...
In other words, Trump might think that he is holding all the winning cards, but the reality is more complicated.
This extends to what happens to exchange rates. Imposing tariffs drives up a local currency, the reverse of what Trump is seeking.
When tariffs were imposed on China during the first Trump and Biden administrations, the net effect was to see an appreciation of the US dollar and a depreciation of the renminbi. To be sure, the US received the tariff revenue, but the impact on trade was muted because of the offsetting impact of the currency movements.
The idea that Trump’s actions can be contested in the World Trade Organisation, something that the Prime Minister, Anthony Albanese, is considering, is fanciful. Apart from the fact that the WTO is barely functional, these types of cases take a long time to conclude. It’s also not clear that the US would take any notice of the final decision.
The more likely outcome is that the world will simply have to wait until the negative effects on US industry and consumers become more apparent. It is at this point that the volatile president could easily change his mind. The impact on the sharemarket is also an important consideration. Were the Dow Jones index to fall significantly, for instance, then there is likely to some rethink of the strategy.
Anticipating the impact on car prices, there has already been an announcement by the Trump administration of full tax deductibility of interest on car loans, which would have the effect of offsetting, at least in part, the tariff hit to consumers. Recall that the soy bean producers who were badly affected by the earlier tariff imposed on China were showered with subsidies to offset the impact.
(At this point the reptiles repeated their list of tariffs, but missed out on vital ones like the 50% on Saint Pierre and Miquelon, the punishment of the ruffians on the Falkland Islands - 41% - the emasculation of the felons of Norfolk Island - 29% - and Nauru - 30% - and the degutting of perhaps the most terrifying and threatening country of all - Tokelau - 10%).
Dame Groan carried on with her groaning, not entirely convinced of the wisdom foisted on the world by her kissing cousins at Faux Noise:
Having said this, there is really no chance that Trump will change his mind on tariffs, at least in the short term. He simply refuses to believe that tariffs are the equivalent of taxes, the burden off which falls mainly on low-income people. And ultimately tariffs are ineffective at encouraging investment in import-competing industries, something that Australia finally came to realise.
zthis is not to deny that there may be geo-strategic reasons for thinking about trade policy – targeted tariffs or bans, even, can make sense to ensure guaranteed supplies of critical goods. But Trump’s Liberation Day is something else: it’s a scattergun approach that will come unstuck over time. In the meantime, other countries will react in varying ways, including imposing tit-for-tat tariffs on US imports while also setting up competing trading blocs.
Australia is best placed to keep its power dry, rule out imposing reciprocal tariffs and wait. Entering into dialogues with these other countries, as well as the US, also makes sense.
Golly, that's all she Groaned?
Did Mein Gott have the best zany solutions of all?
In all the fuss, the pond almost forgot to mention a two minute outing by the WSJ Editorial Board, faithfully reproduced by the reptiles, The MAGA backlash arrives, The Democrats’ victory in the Wisconsin Supreme Court election is a warning to Republicans that the Trump-Musk governing style could cost them control of Congress next year.
So much winning ... Elon Musk listens as US President Donald Trump speaks in the Oval Office of the White House in Washington, DC, on February 11.
Winning hugely ...
Democrats turned out in large numbers to defeat Republican Judge Brad Schimel in a race in which the two sides may have spent as much as $100 million. Democrats sought to make the race a referendum on Elon Musk and Donald Trump, and Mr Musk responded by trying to mobilise the Trump voters who tend to stay home in spring elections. The Democratic bet paid off.
That’s a warning to the GOP that the Trump-Musk governing style is stirring a backlash that could cost them control of Congress next year. All the more so given the results in two special House races in Florida Tuesday to replace a pair of Republicans.
These are safe seats, and Republicans won the western Panhandle district held by Matt Gaetz with some room to spare. But Jimmy Patronis’s 57 per cent was about nine points less than the 66 per cent that Mr Gaetz won in 2024. It was a similar story in the Palm Coast seat of former Rep. Mike Waltz, who is now Mr Trump’s national security adviser.
Democrats had a better candidate, but the swing to Democrats was about nine points from Mr Waltz’s 66.5 per cent vote share in 2024 to state Sen. Randy Fine’s roughly 57 per cent on Tuesday. Democrats are fired up to make a statement about Mr Trump’s polarising second term. Last week they flipped a Pennsylvania state Senate seat long held by the GOP.
The winning never stopped, Wisconsin's Supreme Court will keep its narrow liberal majority after Dane County Circuit Judge Susan Crawford eased to victory in one of the most closely watched state judicial races in yea …
Or was this just another WSJ FAFO moment?
But the elections are a warning to Mr Trump to focus on what got him re-elected — especially prices and growth in real incomes after inflation. His willy-nilly tariff agenda undermining stock prices and consumer and business confidence isn’t helping.
As for Wisconsin, Republicans in that state will now have to live with a wilful Supreme Court majority that could reverse nearly everything the GOP accomplished under former Gov. Scott Walker. School vouchers, collective-bargaining reform for public workers, tort reform and more are likely to be challenged in lawsuits by the left. Congressional district electoral maps will also be challenged and could cost the GOP two House seats.
The MAGA majority may have a shorter run than advertised.
The Wall St Journal
Oh yes, there'll be huge winning....
Finally on this freedumb day, a friend sent along a link to a piece from Germany's Zeid.de, by Von Florian Illies, Thanks America, That’ll Be All, Andy Warhol, Big Mac, iPhone: It was a grand American epoch. But it’s over. Europe must finally emancipate itself – just not as awkwardly as Jürgen Habermas might like.
It was a vale and an elegy, but there also seemed to be a lot of winning ...
The spirit of the age found a home in America, and the west wind reliably blew all the benefits and aberrations of capitalism across the Atlantic, every new music style, every new art genre, every new student movement, every new take on the world. But now that lunacy has installed itself in Washington for the next four years, the time has finally come for Europe to once again try its hand at hosting the spirit of the age. After all, that arrangement worked out rather well for the 2000 years before Hemingway and the Big Mac.
A brief reminder: When the Europeans conquered the American continent in the early 16th century, at a time when coyotes and grizzlies were still bidding each other good night where New York and Los Angeles would later appear – Raphael, Michelangelo and Leonardo were feverishly drawing, painting and building the Medici’s Florence, the spiritual center of the world. And this High Renaissance was itself just a "rebirth" of the venerated advanced civilizations of Greek and Roman antiquity a couple thousand years earlier.
We have, in other words, a slightly larger slice of the cultural history pie than the North Americans. And yes, it is, in fact, astounding just how fast they were able to catch up in the 19th century and cruise on past in the 20th century – technically, militarily and culturally. But now the time has come to stop obsessing about the humiliations from the New World and reflect on our own roots and strengths here in the Old World.
Never forget: Coffee existed even before Starbucks. And the computer was invented by Konrad Zuse, not Steve Jobs. The best books by Fitzgerald, Hemingway and Susan Sontag are set in Europe, Andy Warhol’s mother comes from the Carpathians, Bill Gates collects French impressionists, and the director of the Metropolitan Museum of Art is from Vienna.
Since World War II, the European – and particularly the German – perception of the U.S. has always been a bit schizophrenic. As deeply objectionable as the McCarthy era, the Vietnam War and the Iraq invasion were, everything cultural and pop-cultural produced by America’s liberal universities, publishing houses, film and record studios was eagerly and reverently snapped by Europeans over the course of several decades. The products from America were usually a bit more original, more fun, more sophisticated – and simply better.
Now, though, with the administration of Donald Trump, it’s not just American politics that is appalling, more appalling than ever before. Consumerism has also lost its shine, as it, too, seems infected by the Trumpian specter of illiberalism. It is spreading like an infectious disease. Those who use Instagram know that Mark Zuckerberg has kowtowed to Trump, those who order something from Amazon know that Jeff Bezos invited the president to his wedding – and every Tesla driver wants to punch the steering wheel every morning because their erstwhile mobile testament to coolness and climate awareness has suddenly become an enabler for Elon Musk’s chainsaw-wielding fever dream. It seems as if everything American has suddenly lost its innocence. Only the brave, recalcitrant journalists from the New York Times, the New Yorker and the Atlantic have not yet fallen under the broad veil of suspicion.
The New York Times? Brave, recalcitrant journalists?
Oh dear he was doing so well up to that moment, but at least the pond now understands what both siderism means in Germany.
Apparently a literal translation would be ... beides Siderismus
Alas and alack, according to at least one English dictionary this only adds to the confusion that the hacks at the NY Times foist on the world in their constant attempts to present both sides of the picture, giving Satan his due while dissing on the angels...
